Ive been told its basically months and months before you can id sex.
What i dont understand is looking at my almost month old they dont look like a male. Do they all start out looking the same and then as they mature you find out?
Not correct. The majority of plants will demonstrate sex at btw 4 and 7 weeks, though we have seen some show as soon as 2 weeks and some as late as 12 weeks.
Correct. The fist sign you will see will be calyxes at the nodes. Those calyxes will possess pistils if female. If male, it presents as calyxes with no pistils and often multiple calyxes (>2) at single nodes. Females will have 1 calyx on each side of the nodes.
Thank you.
Im growing from regular seed so its a guessing game what will pop out 
Regular seeds are generally 50:50 male/female. Good luck with them, mate.